Deadlines …
Posted on July 26, 2007
Filed Under RELEVANT Editors |
The past several days, the magazine has been on deadline, a process which generally makes me feel like my head is in a slowly-tightening vise. I have to say, though, the new issue has turned out incredibly well. It’s my favorite thus far. It turned out to have a near-perfect balance of deep and challenging spiritual content and great interviews. Most of that is due to our recent trip to The Call in Nashville, Tenn. It was an amazing event. The thing that most struck me about the gathering was the humility of all those involved. In a culture where worship leaders and speakers are often seen as celebrities, it’s refreshing to attend an event that was focused entirely on prayer. The leaders on the stage deflected every bit of the crowd’s attention to God. It really feels like something powerful and spiritually significant happened that day. In fact, it affected us so deeply that we pulled features from the magazine at the last minute in order to run an article about the efforts of those behind The Call and the 24/7 prayer movement. You’ll be able to read that soon. Anyway, as promised, the plot for another Rambo film is below. Until next time …
RAMBO VI: REVENGE OF THE WIZARD’S CLOAK
The film opens with Rambo attempting to make a comeback as a major league baseball pitcher. He is in a field, throwing baseballs at empty milk cans. Suddenly, he is approached by the General. The General informs him of a terrorist plot to simultaneously blow up every orphanage in the world. “I won’t let that happen again,” Rambo says. “Not after what happened to Bobby.” It should be noted that, at no time in this or any other Rambo film are we informed who Bobby is. Rambo turns and hurls a baseball toward his house, which inexplicably explodes. The next scene, we see Rambo base-jumping off the Grand Canyon. When he reaches the bottom, there is a herd of wild horses, one of which Rambo tames and rides back to the top of the canyon. He then jumps the canyon on the horse, leading into a ten-minute montage of Rambo riding across the U.S., occasionally stopping to perform random good deeds, all set to a screaming hair metal soundtrack (possibly by Ratt or Cinderella). As the music fades, we see that Rambo has somehow ridden his horse into the jungles of Viet Nam. He is immediately surrounded by an enemy militia, the first wave of whom he kills by throwing his horse at them. He kills militiamen for about 90 minutes, uninterrupted. At some point, Rambo kills a man we are to assume is the ringleader of the orphanage-blowing-up plot. As he stands in the midst of the carnage he has created, Rambo is approached by an unidentified young man, who says, “Wow, Rambo! You managed to save all the orphans in the world, and win the World Series!” Keep in mind, we have not seen Rambo play a single inning of baseball. Rambo smiles and winks at the camera and the picture freezes and slowly morphs into a baseball card, reading “John Rambo, MVP.” Roll credits.
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10 Responses to “Deadlines …”
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Bravo!
Hey Adam, what do you think of FIXMAS? I talked to Cameron briefly when he called Brad Lomenick last week (over here at Catalyst).
My favorite line:
“Rambo turns and hurls a baseball toward his house, which inexplicably explodes.”
For some reason, everytime I read that I chuckle like someone is tickling my feet.
I should put socks on.
i just watched a you tube ad for some “be a worship leader” contest camp like thing. i can see some of the heart behind it, but still not sure about the whole contest part. that said, looking forward to hearing more about the call.
It’s neat to see the recent examples of how Relevant follows the spirit….first with the money issue, now with some 24/7 lovin.
nice Rambo/Nacho intersection with ‘all the orphans in the world’
What?! I love Relevant.
I really enjoyed the revised version of rambo 4, the other preview just didn’t cut it for me. Who knew he would kill everyone, and win a world series, what are the chance. I hope bobby is brought back for rambo 5.
http://bumpgalletta.blogspot.com/
I just checked the IMDB boards, and it’s official:
Rambo VI will be scored by Ratt, and in a suprising turn of events: Explosions in the Sky.
Maybe they should just skip a couple of movies, and go right to X that would be awesome, because all of Rambos long lost childern, and orphans he has saved would be old enough to meet up and form a army to rescue Rambo when he is unexpectedly caught. That would be great, I would eat chicken wings to that.
wow…i do believe that ramo is the next mc Dreamy…hmm… does ramo do birthday parties perhaps?