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World’s Humblest Angel Dolly Parton Has Bowed Out of Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Consideration

Dolly Parton is at it again, “it” being yet more examples of her incandescent niceness. As if the already endless examples of her being one of America’s finest exports weren’t enough, she is now demonstrating some high class humility by bowing out of consideration for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. As she announced on social media:

Even though I am extremely flattered and grateful to be nominated for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, I don’t feel that I have earned that right. I really do not want votes to be split because of me, so I must respectfully bow out.

She doesn’t feel she has earned that right. She doesn’t feel she has earned that right. Dolly! Girl. What are you talking about? If writing “I Will Always Love You” and “Jolene” on the same day doesn’t get you a spot in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, then what good is the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame? What good is it, Dolly? If anything, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame hasn’t earned you. 

But that’s not all. She goes on to say that she’d like to throw her hat in the ring down the road …after she’s got a legitimate rock and roll album.

“I do hope that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame will understand and be willing to consider me again — if I’m ever worthy [Editor’s Note: if she’s ever worthy?? Dolly!] This has, however, inspired me to put out a hopefully great rock ‘n’ roll album at some point in the future [Editor’s Note: !!!], which I have always wanted to do! My husband is a total rock ‘n’ roll freak, and has always encouraged me to do one [Editor’s Note: What a prince!]. I wish all of the nominees good luck and thank you again for the compliment. Rock on!

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This, of course, isn’t the first time Dolly has taken herself out of consideration for honors. She asked lawmakers to can a proposal that would erect a statue of her in the capitol building of her home state of Tennessee. And — get this — she recently revealed that she turned down the Presidential Medal of Freedom. Twice. If that’s not rock and roll, what is?

Look, you can’t help but admire everything about this, but let’s be real here. “9 to 5” goes harder than, like, 90 percent of modern rock, and that includes songs written by guys in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, so she’s really excusing herself on the thinnest of technicalities. Rock isn’t about whether or not the guitar is plugged in. It’s a vibe, and that vibe has been personified by Dolly Parton for 76 years and running. You’re in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame of our hearts, Dolly! Rock on, indeed.

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