The world is changed. You can feel it in the air. You can feel it in the water. But if that water is actually coming from a burst pipe in your house, don’t bother calling the world’s most famous plumbing duo, because they got out of the business. That’s right, Mario is no longer a plumber, per Nintendo.
As Kotaku noted on Mario’s official, Japanese-language website, Mario’s profile reveals that his plumbing days are behind him. Their english translation reads.[lborder]
All around sporty, whether it’s tennis or baseball, soccer or car racing, he [Mario] does everything cool. As a matter of fact, he also seems to have worked as a plumber a long time ago…[/lborder]
“A long time ago?” For goodness’ sakes, Nintendo, we’re not that old. How old was the kid you got to write this profile?Six?
Admittedly, Mario’s lengthy adventures in Mushroom Kingdom certainly would cut into the plumbing business. He’s spent enough time over there that it’s apparently called Super Mario World. Once you’ve got a whole world named after you, it would be a little hard to go back to plumbing. There’s also the simple matter that Mario appears to be proficient in medicine, professional sports, race car driving and piloting, so he’ll probably be able to survive the millennial gig economy better than most of us. Still, hard not to miss the simple days where the Mario Brothers were just two plumbers who ended up in a simple world of murderous turtles and Goombas in which any Warp Tunnel could catapult you to underground lairs full of golden coins which, when collected, cou — you know, maybe it wasn’t so simple after all.
Tyler Huckabee is RELEVANT's senior editor. He lives in Nashville with his wife, dog and Twitter account.