It’s a wonderful thing to experience passion. Passion and true belief in something always appear thematically throughout movies, books and television. So often and in such a way, in fact, that I think people often start to believe it only exists in fictitious realms, never to be taken as something real — leave it between the pages, in the theater.
But I know passion. There have been many times in my life where I’ve been a part of something that stirred my soul, something that touched me in a way that it couldn’t be ignored or quenched. One of these, and the most intense, was the love of my God; another, the love of a woman. When your faith is all but destroyed and the one you love is lost, passion turns against you. It becomes your rage and hurt and disappointment. It becomes fuel for animosity. These are the valleys.
Then comes decision time. I chose (after some self-indulgence and self-pitying), despite these losses and hurts, to move forward with my life. Standing on the edge, I found myself much like the author of Ecclesiastes. Like the final chapter of Ecclesiastes, with a last breathe of desperation and willing to risk it all, I cast my hope on the God whose existence I wasn’t even sure of anymore.
That decision has paid off ten fold. Flash forward two years to today. It is my 21st birthday. I woke up early and have spent the day receiving phone calls and emails from good friends. Thinking back over where I’ve been and where I am today, I can’t help but be struck with how strange and how beautiful life is. The passion I thought I had lost is now full force in my life. I am a part of many things that I love. I am doing what every kid dreams about. I am playing music and making records and even able to do some traveling to share my art with others. I am a part of a community that loves and supports me and is actively involved in my life. And every day I experience the injustice of grace. This blessing, above all, is the one that should stir relentlessly within me. Like the words of Jeremiah, “And I can’t stop! If I say I’ll never mention the Lord or speak in his name, his word burns in my heart like a fire. It’s like a fire in my bones! I am weary of holding it in!”
The gifts of my life supercede my capabilities to repay. I hope that the life that I live, a life of pursuit, passion and true belief, somehow touches others to experience the God whose robe I have only touched. Lyricist Ric Hordinski wrote these words, which I often find being played over and over in my head, “The destination is the journey.” I don’t know where God will lead me, but I know that he has lead me here.
I know passion. It isn’t fictitious — something the movies created years ago or some author conjured up. It is one of the greatest gifts our Creator has given us. It is very real. And it is mine.
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