Written by author and speaker Jarrod Jones, 13 Ways To Ruin Your Life–A Practical Guide For Guys is …
Written by author and speaker Jarrod Jones, 13 Ways To Ruin Your Life–A Practical Guide For Guys is a life-saving manual for men on how to wage war against pornography and other types of sexual sin. With a voice that is honest, frank and real, Jones offers life-saving truth for any man—and life-changing hope for those currently battling sexual sin. 13 Ways To Ruin Your Life (Gresham Hill Publishing) will be available for free download at www.13waystoruinyourlife.com beginning today.
Q. Why did you decide to write a book about men’s struggles with sexual sin?
A. Where do I start? There are books out there on sexual sin. But I felt like most of them never moved from the issues of sexual sin and into confrontation with those in sexual sin. There was never a punch to the chest. I wrote the book to punch a guy in the chest.
Also, you don’t need to reflect deeply to know that we are in a sex saturated and crazed culture. For example, I was browsing through motorcycle magazines at a bookstore this afternoon (I’m a Harley dude), and the magazine that jumped off the shelf was the one with the big-breasted woman. I didn’t gaze at it. It was just that millisecond exposure and my brain computed her pose. The TV drama Grey’s Anatomy is a popular show among twenty-thirty year olds. In the first or second season, two of the characters were portrayed as having STD’s. And it was made out to the viewer as normal and humorous. Nelly has a video out swiping a credit card through a woman’s rear-end for crying out loud.
On a personal note, I have a family member who divorced because of her husband’s addiction to porn. He ran up thousands of dollars on porn hotlines among other things. I’ve shared the platform with a minister who committed adultery on his wife. I’ve gotten e-mails from young men who are enslaved to porn, masturbation, and guilt. And round and round we go. There are unspeakable repercussions—mentally, emotionally, relationally, and spiritually—that come out of sexual sin. I think I just got mad at how sexual sin shadows everything we see and hear, and everywhere we go. I got angry over the men who were falling to sexual sin and the families who were crushed under the debris of the fall out.
Q. In this book you focus heavily on the topic of pornography, do you feel men struggle with this type of sexual sin more than others?
A. I don’t feel it. I know it. It’s easy to hide. It’s anonymous. It’s easily available. And it’s cheaply accessible. And you can check out the stats too.
Q. Do you think that Christian men struggle with pornography just as much as non-Christian men? What is your reasoning?
A. Yes I do. It’s so easy to rationalize and keep hidden. It’s an escape. You don’t have a real-life woman who may turn and expose you. It’s not like you can walk away from the laptop and someone smell the porn on you. It’s an enticing and easy sin that can be “enjoyed” while protecting a reputation of character and godliness. I’m convinced that porn is the number one sin, addiction, and struggle of Christian men. I’ll just throw this out there: In a non-scientific poll taken by XXXChurch.com, as reported by CNN in 2007, 70% of Christians admitted to struggling with porn in their daily lives.
Q. Have you dealt with sexual sin yourself?
A. I was a successful college athlete. With the bit of attention I received, girls became somewhat “available.” I took advantage of opportunities that came my way. I carry great regret with that. Not just for me but also for the girls that I took advantage of. I wish I had been committed to Christ and protected them from me. Later I met a girl that I wanted to marry. Within months our relationship became more centered around sex than companionship.
Q. What caused the turn around?
A. Within two weeks of proposing she left me for another guy. I wasn’t exactly an innocent party but the end of the relationship tore me apart. I couldn’t sleep or eat. I had suicidal thoughts. A week later I came to the end of myself and cried out to Jesus on my knees in my apartment bedroom. It was there I confessed, repented of sin and embraced Jesus. I walked away from that night a wreck, but with hope. I knew I wanted to follow Jesus with all of my heart, soul, mind and body. I grew to know that only He satisfied. Lust never would, nor would any relationship. Girlfriends and relationships can make horrible gods.
Q. What would you say to leaders who are ministering to a person that is struggling with sexual sin?
A. Pray. Pray for your protection. Pray for the person’s repentance and deliverance. Pray with the person. Get them help—professional Christian counseling. Ultimately, this is just the way to go. Also, I’m a firm believer of “a finger in the chest.” In other words, sometimes a guy needs to be confronted like a man. He needs to be told to repent of his sin. He needs to know the seriousness of his sin and that it will ruin his testimony, his relationships and his life. Just think of how King Solomon spoke of the young man in Proverbs 7 who was waltzing into sexual sin. He calls the young man “simple,” or in our translation, “stupid.” But still it’s an issue of the heart. This comes to trusting the Spirit to break his heart and chains. Lastly, and I am as serious as I can be when I say this—get him a copy of my book 13 Ways To Ruin Your Life.
Q. Why did you and your ministry partners decide to make “13 Ways” available for free online?
A. We’ve given away over 1200 copies of the paperback already. And we’re excited that the PDF copy will be free beginning October 13. Sexual sin is ruining marriages, families, testimonies and lives unlike ever before. We have a sense of urgency. And we wanted to take away as many obstacles as possible to get this book in the hands of men. And we figured if people could download Internet porn for free then why not be able to download this book for free.
For a free download of 13 Ways To Ruin Your Life, visit www.13waystoruinyourlife.com
