Recently, NFL superstar Carson Wentz teamed up with a local church in Philadelphia to launch a food truck which serves free food to communities in need. It’s a really cool project, unfortunately, they named it “Thy Kingdom Crumb.”
Ever since the Christian bookstore candy “Testamints,” Christian businesses and products have been a breeding ground for dad-joke level puns that are more cringe-inducing than inspirational.
We recently asked RELEVANT Podcast listeners to tell us some of their ideas for Christian business-based puns, and they did not disappoint.
Here are some of our favorites.
Egg seller: Equally yolked
Catholic car repair shop: Cruci-fix auto
Boat launching service: Docks-ology
Beachfront Chinese restaurant: Wok on Water
Coffee shop: Shadrach, Meschach and ABEANtogo … “We’re roasting all day long.”
Mall kiosk pop-up for threading and waxing: “Brow down before Him”
Southern Baptist electrolysis hair removal business: “Once shaved, always shaved”
— Patch
“The Thief Comes” Security Systems
“Lay My Head to Rest” Sleep Systems
Delilah’s Salon & Spa
Goliath Protein Powder
“Find Your Boaz” Dating Service
“Thy Will Be Done” Legal Offices and Mortuary Services
“Saul to Paul” Optical Care
Lazarus Lawn Care: “We resurrect your dead lawn!”
“Fissures of Men”: A Christian spelunking company
“Hedge of Protection”: Christian landscaping and home security
“Father, Bun, Holy Toast” Bakery
“TriniTea” Tea Company
“Milk & Honey” Ice Creamery
“Wise Stewards” Accounting Firm
“Refiner’s Fire” Woodfire Pizza
“Eye for an Eye” Attorneys at Law
— Stacey Hausler
Dentist Office: “Crowned with Many Crowns”
— Kyle Atwell
