Pulling off a successful parody music video is no easy task.

To work, the parody song needs three things: 1) resemble a familiar pop tune, 2) have clever, self-aware lyrics and 3) be short enough to make people actually watch the whole thing.

When it comes to Christian parody videos, “Baby Got Book” remains the gold standard:

And yet, despite this terrific reference material, the church responsible for the 2012 catastrophe “Super Church Shuffle” managed to botch all three criteria. 

First, the “Super Church Shuffle” is based off the “Super Bowl Shuffle,” a novelty song by members of the 1985 Chicago Bears football team. When is the last time you have heard, or even thought about, the “Super Bowl Shuffle?” Its heyday was almost 35 years ago, and it was a short-lived heyday at that.

Secondly, aside from the worship pastor in the “Super Church Shuffle,” who seems to recognize how south their idea has gone, most of the people in this video are fully dedicated to “rapping” their verse with painfully little irony.

Finally, if you include the nearly five minute (!!) blooper reel, “Super Church Shuffle” clocks in at nearly 10 excruciating minutes. Seriously, just when you think it’s impossible to cringe any harder, somehow, the video manages to get worse.

Let this serve as a warning to any church staff thinking of attempting a parody music video.

(Hat tip to Christian Nightmares for the incredible find.)