Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. (Romans 12:10)
I was presented with an interesting question recently: “If you could only tell your future kids one thing and one thing only, what would it be?” Before I begin to answer this question I should explain that one of my primary desires is to advocate the primacy of intimate and vulnerable relationships. I believe that deep relationships are the answer to most of life’s unanswered questions. Relationships are what life was made for.
As I sat there thinking about the one thing that I would teach my children, and narrowed it down to one answer: I would tell them to “be someone else’s best _____.”
To be someone else’s best means that everything you do is for the relationship. To strive to be someone else’s best means that you care so much about them that you are always there to support them, to encourage them, to understand them and to experience life with them. It means that you will go out of your way to sacrifice for them, to participate in the things that are meaningful to them, and to help them achieve their dreams. To be someone’s best is to love them always and not judge them.
Think about the ways you can be someone else’s best. If your aim is to be someone else’s best, a transformation will take place in your life that will affect the way you see, treat and love those around you. This will be the catalyst towards an intimacy that you haven’t experienced before and will continue to deepen your relationship. Along with also being vulnerable, you will find that the reward is an intimacy where trust prevails, and there is a mutual honoring, respect and love for each other.
Intimacy is a scary thing. It forces us to trust our most fragile parts to someone we know is fallen; someone we know who has at least at one point, disappointed someone, failed someone or betrayed someone. Intimacy puts us in a place where rejection seems like it shouts at us—where fear often presents itself as the only emotion available, and where we show the parts of ourselves that we have a hard time not being shameful about on our own let alone with another person. Intimacy is a scary thing, but life without intimacy is life without meaning.
Imagine if everyone were to serve each other and be a “best _____” to everyone they came in contact with. I don’t think this is impossible, or something that is unattainable, but it is challenging. Imagine a world where everyone is trying to be someone else’s best, not for selfish reasons, but for reasons that are beyond themselves. Imagine if we were driven to enrich the other people’s lives to such an extent that the recipient believes that there could be no better friend, brother, sister, spouse, leader, counselor, etc … What a world that would be!
Dear God, push me to be the best for Your people. Show me how to love them and care for them in the same perfect way You do.